All by myself

CockMaster is out of town for a trial.  AngryGinger is asleep.  I’m watching American Idol because there’s nothing else on.  They are doing something about the Boston Tea Party.  Really?  You can’t teach history to the majority of the dumbasses who are watching this including myself.  Oh well. 

I’m just going to watch porn instead of this shit. 

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Fuck Me

Is it a good thing to be needed at work?

In this economy, that tends to be a yes.

Fuck me while I bend over.

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Dear Elin,

Hi I don’t know you, but I think  you are hot.  I want you & your twin sister to make out.  I also want you to get all of your douchebag husband’s money & roll around in it naked.  I also suggest moving to Sweden where you can make out with more Swedish hot chicks.

For you, I’ll junk punch Rachel Uslut.  The other whores are just whores so they don’t get junk punch.

Forever yours,

Cunt Rag

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So I can’t get out of my head

a dick flapping around from the movie, Bruno.

Flap Flap Round Round

So Angryman is trying to blog again. I thought maybe I would give it a go.  I’m still pretty active on FaceBook under AngryGinger’s profile.  It still has entertaiment value for me.  I can get away with a lot of things under a baby’s name than my own.

It’s hard to put into words what I want to rant about.  

Being an adult sucks ass. 

That’s all for right now. 

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What about the hard working women & trannies out there?

There’s Administrative Professionals Day (formerly known as Secretary’s Day).  There’s Boss’ Day

What about Prostitues’ Day?

 

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Things in my gym bag…

condoms & diapers

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Saggy balls brings me out of the dark hole of the real world

So I got this email from Malach that was a forward from BuzzardBilly about Mischa Barton’s boyfriend saggy balls.  

 

 The picture says it all…Mmm…makes me all wet like that Bud.

I’m going to send this AngryMan, I’m sure he wants this as his desktop background.

On a personal cunt note,  we are all well.  AG is a happy bald chubby six tooth 11 month old who still loves to hang off my milkjugs.  CockMaster is liking his job.  So the one more year we have left to pay for his law loans thank the Law Gods that he likes his work.  I’m still trying to juggle the job, mootherhood, wifehood, & cunthood. 

One day Blog I’ll return, when I’m more pissed off.  It’s hard to be pissed off when there’s a lot of the L word floating around.  Being a mama to a fat bald baby brings so much joy & L word.  Saggy balls!  Good I feel better after saying joy & L word together.  I can’t be too much of a sappy pussy.

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My SoulDyke & Are you a Good Person?

This is an email exchange so start from the bottom.  This is dedicated to my friend/coworker who has a very similar sense of humor.  If she leaves I will miss her.  She’s like an arty version of me.

 

From: Cunt Rag
Sent: Tuesday, June 09, 2009 4:14 PM
To: Co-Worker#6
Subject: RE: Work Stuff

 

There’s only sharing if I go first.  I don’t like sloppy seconds.


 From: Co-worker#6
Sent: Tuesday, June 09, 2009 4:13 PM

To: Cunt Rag
Subject: Re: Work Stuff
 You are do twisted. Hopefully CockMaster will be able to share you with your soul-butch


From: Cunt Rag
To: Co-worker#6
Sent: Tue Jun 09 16:11:34 2009

Subject: RE: Work Stuff

I’ve only made out with chicks & I liked it.  I’ve never gone all the way.  I’m saving myself for my soul-dyke.

So no I’m not a real lesbo, but some day my soul-dyke with a female mullet will come.


From: Co-worker#6
Sent: Tuesday, June 09, 2009 4:08 PM
To: Cunt Rag
Subject: Re: Work Stuff
 The term is power muff. Maybe you aren’t a lesbo. Every real lesbo knows its power muff


From: Cunt Rag
To: Co-worker#6

Sent: Tue Jun 09 16:06:35 2009
Subject: RE: Work Stuff

I like carpet only neatly shaven.  No wild untrimmed bushes.  


From: Co-worker#6
Sent: Tuesday, June 09, 2009 4:06 PM
To: Cunt Rag
Subject: Re: Work Stuff

 You are such a lesbian.


From: Cunt Rag
To: Co-worker#6
Sent: Tue Jun 09 16:05:04 2009
Subject: RE: Work Stuff

The only sin I have committed is looking at women lustfully… which is all of the time.   


 From: Co-Worker#6
Sent: Tuesday, June 09, 2009 4:03 PM
To: Cunt Rag
Subject: Re: Work Stuff
 WTF?! Talk about passing the buck. Maybe I don’t want to talk to her!

Pull it together Rag. Maybe you should read the ARE YOU A GOOD PERSON? pamphletI left you a little more closely.


Jeez I kid - I’ll work with Co-Worker#2.


From: Cunt Rag
To:
Co-Worker#6
Sent: Tue Jun 09 15:43:11 2009
Subject: RE: Work Stuff

 Co-Worker#6, Sorry for not getting back with you about this, but Co-Worker#2 has the access to do what you are requesting.  Just shoot her an email about which ones that needs to be cleaned up. Let me know if there’s anything else. Thanks,Cuntie

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I want to ride my bicycle.

So CockMaster & I have bought bikes.  I biked in college because it would take me two minutes to get to class.  We were talking about how it would be a good way to get around.  We live near a greenway.  CockMaster can bike into work.  I can bike to the farmer’s market & library.   I plan on getting a child’s seat, but from what I’ve seen online they recommand waiting until the child is at least a year old so we have a few more months until AG & I are cruising & picking up chicks.

The other day I rode my bike down to the farmer’s market & we have a good number of hills.  I’ve forgotten how much fun it is to go down a hill and just let go & feel the rush of the air.  In college there weren’t any hills.  As a kid there were & it was so much fun riding your bike around especially on the golf course’s big hill.  It was thrilling.

I felt like I was nine again going down these hills & peddling hard to go up them.  I wish we had more bike lanes around.  I think people would be in better moods if we were biking everywhere like we were kids instead all tense and pissy in our cars.

So I saw this clip of this toddler preaching.  It is disturbing & funny.  I have a theory that we should like kids be kids & dumpter sluts be dumpster sluts.  Don’t make a toddler be a preacher.  Come on let a toddler be a toddler!

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I feel the Earth Move Under my Feet

So I experienced my first earthquake. I don’t live in a area know to have earthquakes. It was only 3.0, but we felt it. I was up with AG nursing of course at 4:00 am when I felt the walls move a loud noise as if an explosion happened. I ran to get CockMaster up. My first thought was it’s an earthquake. My folks & sister for part of her adulthood have lived in California & they’ve told me about their experiences. I quickly said to myself “That’s impossible. We don’t have earthquakes here.” CockMaster checked around the house to make sure it wasn’t anything just with our house. We then went on the back on the deck & other neighbors were out on their porchs & decks & yards all in their pjs all hollaring back & forth to each other what WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?

So we saw a group of neighbors on the corner some in robes others with clothes that were put on quickly in the dark. One of the older neighbors had a police scanner. What we were able to decipher was that it was an earthquake.

Later the news reported it was 3.0 on the Richter Scale no damages or injuries were reported, but it was wierd to feel like the whole house moved.

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